Forever Friendships: A Road Trip 50 Years in the Making
In the summer of 1973, two recent Otterbein graduates — Darcy Elliott McDonald ’72 and Debra Andrews Hoeg ’72 — packed up a car and set their sights west.
They had met when they joined the same sorority five years prior and quickly became close friends and, later, roommates. Now, they were just two months away from starting graduate school 500 miles apart. The weeks before then, they decided, should be filled with fun and adventure. They wanted to see California together. And they wanted to take their time getting there.
Those were the ambitions that echoed in Darcy and Debbie’s minds as they finally crossed from Arizona into California last fall — 51 years after their road trip first began.
“We smelled the flowers along the way,” Darcy said. There were more flowers than they expected. Setting out the first time, the two friends had little to rely upon outside of a map, a AAA Triptik, and a bright orange 1972 Buick Skylark with a white vinyl top.
“If you know Darcy and me,” Debbie said, “you know there wasn’t a lot of planning.”
They embraced every unexpected stop, detour, and adventure they could. They visited colleges they’d once applied to before choosing Otterbein, and esoteric historic sites like the childhood home of Dwight D. Eisenhower, America’s 34th president.
They fell in love with places like New Mexico and the Grand Canyon. Debbie recalls getting a flat tire while driving on a desolate country road in Kansas and being stumped by how they were supposed to replace it with the spare they had in the trunk until a farmer puttering by on a large tractor stopped to lend a hand.
Darcy Elliott McDonald ’72 and Debra Andrews Hoeg ’72 at the California state line.
“We just had a lot of fun and funny experiences along the way that gave us the feeling of, OK, we’re off on our own. We can do this.”
They fell in love with places like New Mexico and the Grand Canyon. Debbie recalls getting a flat tire while driving on a desolate country road in Kansas and being stumped by how they were supposed to replace it with the spare they had in the trunk until a farmer puttering by on a large tractor stopped to lend a hand.
“We just had a lot of fun and funny experiences along the way,” Darcy said, “that gave us the feeling of, OK, we’re off on our own. We can do this.”
As the trip progressed, however, the two began to realize they were coming perilously close to not returning home in time to begin graduate school. They got as far as Phoenix before turning back for home, abandoning the true destination of California.
Graduate school came and went, and the two remained close. Darcy began a relationship in Virginia with a man named Gordon McDonald, and the two of them set Debbie up with Everett Hoeg, a friend of Gordon’s. Debbie moved to Virginia, both couples got married, and the two pairs settled down about 30 minutes from each other. Weekend visits were frequent throughout the ensuing decades until Darcy and Gordon moved to Georgia in the mid-2010s; since then, the friendship has been sustained by Monday night video calls.
All along, Debbie and Darcy’s pre-grad school road trip was a topic the two would occasionally return to — with some good-natured teasing from their husbands, who wouldn’t let them forget they hadn’t finished it. They still intended to reach California, the women assured them. Sometime.to — with some good-natured teasing from their husbands, who wouldn’t let them forget they hadn’t finished it. They still intended to reach California, the women assured them. Sometime.
Then, last fall — 51 years after they first embarked from Ohio — the lifelong friends decided they’d waited long enough. Opting to pick up from the same place they left off, Debbie and Darcy flew to Phoenix, rented a car, and began their drive to San Francisco. In many ways, the end of the five-decade journey was a lot different from the beginning. Both women’s husbands tagged along, for starters. To accommodate the larger carload, a modern Toyota SUV took the place of the ’72 Skylark.
But the spirit of the old trip remained. The group set aside two weeks to make the 12-hour drive, expecting lots of twists and turns along the way.
“We went from Phoenix to San Diego, and then just followed the coast up, taking our time and enjoying the coastal California drive and being tourists,” Darcy said.
As rare as it is to find a friendship that endures the way Darcy and Debbie’s has, lifelong bonds like this are one of many unique things Otterbein alumni take pride in. In fact, recently Lynn Ridinger established a $25,000 scholarship endowment in honor of a Round Robin letter-writing circle that her parents — Miriam Wetzel Ridinger ’51, P’82 and Gerald “Jug” Ridinger ’49, P’82 — maintained with eight Epsilon Kappa Tau alumnae (read more at right) and their spouses for more than 70 years after graduating.
Fifty-one years after they first embarked from Ohio, the lifelong friends decided they’d waited long enough.
Darcy Elliott ‘72 McDonald and Debra Andrews ‘72
The scholarship will benefit students involved in fraternity and sorority life, a community on campus which sparked the formation of the Round Robin friend group, as well as the friendship between Darcy and Debbie. “(Attending Otterbein) was such a special time, and a big part of that wasn’t just what you gleaned from your education, but also the friendships that you made,” Darcy said. “I feel blessed to have such a wonderful friend. I still send Christmas cards to some high school friends, but I don’t really have any relationship like I do with Debbie.”
Round Robins: The Original Group Chats
In the past, groups of Otterbein friends kept in touch through Round Robins, letters that travel through circle of friends sharing news about everything from new jobs and houses to marriages and births. These letters contained photographs and newspaper clippings to chronicle the lives of the Round Robin members. The following was submitted by Miriam Wetzel Ridinger ’51, P’82 and published in the Winter 2000 issue of Towers:
Five of the original members at graduation from Otterbein in 1951.
Round Robin Reunion in 1956 with children and spouses at the Ridinger home in Dayton, OH.
“Our Round Robin . . . began in 1947 in King Hall when eight young women became close friends as freshmen. This bond was strengthened when all eight pledged Epsilon Kappa Tau and continued growing through our four years at Otterbein. Following graduation, we began to correspond individually until Phyl Weygandt ’51 suggested a Round Robin letter which we all heartily endorsed. Through all these years, it has been healthy and vigorous and makes the circuit two or three times a year.
The fact that six of us married Otterbein men who knew each other helped us become a couples group and formed an even stronger bond. Not only have we kept the letter going, but we also get together yearly, and sometimes twice a year since retirement . . . Every fifth year we gather in Westerville for Alumni Weekend. Over the years we have filled three large photo albums and in 1991, we made a video of our first two albums.
The Round Robin offspring have referred to us as an incredible group of true friends and an inspiration to them regarding the value of friends and family. Our Round Robin has been a deeply important part of our lives and certainly has strengthened our bond to Otterbein.”
Original Round Robin members: Phyllis Weygandt Auerbach ’51, Bobbie Schutz Barr ’51, P’77, Priscilla Warner Berry ’51, Shirley Adams Detamore ’51, Phyllis Shannon Marcotte ’51, Ruth Anne Smith Moore ’51, Barb Bartlebaugh Pyles ’53, Miriam Wetzel Ridinger ’51, P’82, Martha Weller Shand ’51.
The 2003 Round Robin Reunion held at Punderson Manor in Newbury, OH.